Fruit & Verse

I’ve been wanting God to grow me. Deeper in my study. Meanings of words. Translations. Tell me more. Show me more.

Grow the fruit on these branches.

Unknowingly, from the seeds I planted years ago.

Seeds that needed more than just a DESIRE in order to grow.

They needed good soil, ☀️ sunlight, 💦 watering, for the bugs 🐛 to stay away, and maybe even a song of encouragement 🎶

Consistently 🫣

I don’t want to be a “baby Christian” anymore daggum it. 😤

“I’m sick of this crap, grandpa!!” type vibe. Ya know?

💡 *Clears throat*

✨ O B E D I E N C E ✨

(There is more to my obedience tidbits I hope to get to soon, not just this)

Taking in, and USING the opportunities He gives us

to BE USED. 🤯

**This might be long. Will you let me know if you made it to the end? **

This week is our church’s annual LOVE week. It’s where we volunteer our time and resources to partner with places in the community and give back! Some places is a facelift, paint, cleaning. Some it’s weeding, mowing, trash removal. Some getting donations, sorting, organizing, etc. You get the idea?

I had known love week was this week. But the date slipped my mind. So Sunday when they announced, I thought, “Oh Yeah! I want to do that.” Since school is out, I have to take the little with me or arrange for someone to keep her, me deliver her, and all that jazz, in the time frame to get to the designated project for the day. Ok. So.

Things definitely come up that try to take the place of your time worshipping. Whatever that looks like. Monday I didn’t even know what the project for the day was. Other than recuperating and chilling out from all the peopling over the weekend (Two days of 4th of July events, friends, and family, multiple conversations at once. Those who get overstimulated know) 🤪 Tuesday passed and by that night I was thinking, “GOSHH. I have got to get to Love Week!!” I looked at the schedule and 9-12 was the food drive. I can do that, and sis can absolutely go with me to that! 🎉 Then, I can go help Ms. Neighbor Lady immediately after and maybe even squeeze in making salsa with mom’s garden tomatoes. 🍅

Get to the food drive, sort things, talk to a few friends and they are talking about the gas giveaway at 1. (I had served for love week in the past but never at the gas event)

I said, “Yeah I’m not going to that.

I just.. don’t want to go to love week and stand around.. I want to be busy” (or did I say used?) 🤔

K: oh no girl, those pics we took were a millisecond pose. Other than that it’s wild and we are running around, lots to do. It’s busyyy.

Me: ahhh, ok. I just planned staying til 12 but..

K: are you a loud person, or a quiet person? (Is this a trick question because depending on who you ask about me, they’d say I lied 🤥) 😂🤪

Me: quiet 🤫

K: you have to yell 📣 gas on pump # but that’s ok you can just get with someone and pump the gas. ⛽️

Me: 👍🏼 🤫 🎉

Grab lunch with sis and then get to the gas station.

Talk to a girl after the little huddle breakdown and I’m like “I have no idea what to do!”

A: Do you feel comfortable praying out loud with people?

Me: NO. 🙅🏼‍♀️

A: Ok well just get with someone who does and you can pump the gas. ⛽️ Take these cards.

Me: ok. *Takes cards*

They start walking away and I just kind of walk slowly and take in what’s going on. First row of pumps fill up with volunteers. I looked around and cars lined up and volunteers spread out. I watch as they approach cars, people roll down the windows. I walk towards the middle, people are yelling across to J “$ on pump 12!! J and 13!!” I see the outer, further pumps have cars pulling up. Sitting there. They saw the Facebook announcement. They were there to get free gas. NO VOLUNTEERS WERE OVER THERE. I look around and people in orange shirts are busy. I thought, “I was there to serve wasn’t I?” So off I go with my cards, sister following. I was CLUELESS. But I just had to give them a card, tell them about our church, that the gas giveaway is part of our love week we do in the summer to give back to the community, and pump their gas.

and…ask them if I can pray for them. 🫣

God I’m just a baby Christian.

God my prayers are not pretty words.

God my prayers will sound so stupid.

God I’m messed up, how am I worthy of praying for someone else.

God my prayers will sound like the prayers you hear on Thanksgiving EVERY year “Let this food be nourishment to our body so we can better serve you”. *Insert giggle* because is it just me or does it really sound recorded and played like the national anthem at ball games? 🤭 🤔

God it won’t mean anything to them. *toddler stomps* I don’t want to. *arms crossed*

I walk to up a car. 😃 HEY 👋🏽 We’re doing a gas giveaway as part of our LOVE WEEK at *gives card* we have service on Sunday 9 & 11 right over there 👉🏼 We want to pump $gas for you!” (That’s so awesome!) Can I pray for you? Is there anything I can pray for?

Some said yes. And gave me specifics. Some said nothing in particular, just life. Some shook their head no and just took the gas.

My voice felt shaky, holding back tears. I’d be lying if I told you I knew they were tears of fear or if tears of confusion. Because I had didn’t have the courage on my own to get those words out. Or tears of gratefulness that I was chosen for that opportunity and I showed up for it.

I was there to be the HANDS AND FEET. To physically pump gas. To serve. To help. Because HELPING truly is (one of) my love language. Taking the burden off someone without a favor or money in return or the feeling of guiltiness or feeling like you owe me. No. It’s my PLEASURE. Literally.

Not the VOICE. I didn’t come there to be bold or loud. Or to speak words of encouragement into some young ladies with babies in the car. Or to pray faith and trust over a teenage boy. Or pray peace over a man grieving a family member. Or give hope to someone who asked “what’s the catch?” 😭

The catch is I want to invite you to church, give you free gas and (pause) …pray for you! That’s it! 🎉

But this. This was obedience. The glow on my face here was ALL God because that is not a face of fear!

Thank you Jesus for the opportunity to not only use me today but to grow me. Thank you for the fruit of the harvest. I pray that whatever words you gave me today touched someone and sparked something in them to act on. To choose better and be better because they desire to be more like you, and less like self. I pray these people have peace beyond understanding, financial miracles, babies protected, children with Godly mentors, straight and narrow paths, and hope where there is only darkness. Thank you for loving us. You are too too good. So grateful.

If you needed a sign, this is it. Show up scared.

Your will. Not mine. 🎉🙌🏽

Maybe I’m kind of a toddler Christian now? 🤗